Will success change you?

I am not a golf fan. I understand the game from friends and in-laws who love the game, but I have no desire to take up the sport nor lose time watching it.

But today I was changed (if just temporarily). Cedar Rapids native, Zach Johnson, was surprisingly in the hunt. During a commercial break on another program I was watching with my kids this Easter afternoon, I flipped channels and noticed on CBS that Zach had a two stroke lead over Tiger and a couple other golfers with about 5 holes to go.

I was glued! My oldest daughter suddenly became a golf fanatic as I described the game and Zach's possible accomplishment. We cheered his shots, groaned over his bogey on 17, and held our breath while the last few golfers finished out. In the end, the Iowa-boy ended on top! (Or should I say "bottom" since it is the lowest score that wins?)

I got online tonight to find out more about Zach's accomplishment when I saw this excellent post by my good friend, Kim Pagel, who caught some of the post interview. What impressed me most is that when Zach was told how this would change him, Zach said "My professional life will change, but I will continue to be the same person as I was before winning the tournament. I've got supportive people around me who will see to that. I'm just a midwest boy from Iowa."

What a great response and attitude! Hopefully it will turn out true, especially if Zach finds more success on the links. And hopefully I will have the same response and attitude if the Lord brings success my way (obviously it won't come on the golf course!).

Photo from ESPN.com

Merry Riskmas

Here's a great (and humorous) short article from Phil Callaway about his risk-taking son.

I wonder what risks God will ask us to take in 2007...

Mean and selfish young adults

I just read on the Catalyst blog that according to the Barna Research group young adults are more likely to break behavioral boundaries in cultural, social, and spiritual areas than their parents' generation. The quote at the end of the post really stood out to me:

Barna’s David Kinnaman notes, “The research shows people’s moral profile is more likely to resemble that of their peer group than it is to take shape around the tenets of a person’s faith.”

I find myself with several things rattling around in my head after reading this.

#1. I hope it's not true. But I fear that it is.

I recently taught a group of parents soon to have out-of-high-school children about preparing their kids for life as an independent young adult. I used material from Paul Stanley (who works with the Navigators) about the different life stages people go through. For the 18-30 group, he says that THE question they are seeking to internally answer is "Who Am I?" This question naturally leads someone to live life slightly more selfishly because they aren't 100% sure of who they are as designed by God, and so they seek experiences and feedback in life that will help to answer this question.

As I have worked with young adults now for almost 5 years (and I fear to say this since many of them will read this) I have seen this to be true. MANY of the decisions they make come from a self-centered viewpoint ("what do I get out of this") than from an others-centered viewpoint ("how will this benefit others"). Often marriage helps in adjusting this, but not always. To be fair, ALL people live life with a bit of selfishness, including myself. But on a stereotypical level, this seems to be more true of 20 and 30-somethings than of the generations ahead of us.

Which brings me to my next thought...

#2. Is this a generational difference that Barna is pointing out or a life stage difference?

Barna makes it seem to be a generational thing, almost as if to say "people over 40 are better than people in their 20s and 30s" But I think Stanley would say it is a life stage thing - and I am inclined to lean that direction myself (but willing to admit the power of peer pressure might lend to these survey results which makes it a generational thing).

If the primary internal question people in their 20s and 30s wrestle with is "who am I?", then people in their 40s and 50s wrestled with that same question twenty years ago. And chances are they too bent their morals during that time of life in order to search and test who they really were. Life experience has helped them see that lying doesn't help, that profanity reveals a weaker mind, gossip comes back to haunt you, and more along the same lines. Plus, they've been answering the question "who am I?" and have moved on to different internal life stage questions. So they change throughout life, coming to the point that they are now.

If this is the case, then I expect in twenty years we'll see similar results in a similar survey from the Barna Group. But if it is a generational thing, then I expect we'll see 40-50 somethings behaving pretty much the same way they are now as 20-somethings.

#3. According to Scripture, this isn't anything new.

Paul writes in 2 Corinthians 12:20, "...I am afraid that when I come I may not find you as I want you to be, and you may not find me as you want me to be. I fear that there may be quarreling, jealousy, outbursts of anger, factions, slander, gossip, arrogance and disorder."

The things Barna is reporting has been part of the human condition for thousands of years, due to something commonly known as sin. But perhaps Paul was writing to a group of young adults... :o)

#4. My next thought is "what should I do with this information?"

I don't think I will "do" much with it, except to use it to encourage me to stay with the same path I've chosen in leading the young adult ministry I oversee. I want to help young adults answer the question "who am I?" and a big part of that is helping them see how God sees them in Christ and the importance then of Christlike character. If they are living with godly character, I don't have to worry about the profanity, lying, gossiping, etc. that Barna is reporting to be true of this generation I love and am called to work with right now. Jesus himself said "For out of the heart come evil thoughts, murder, adultery, sexual immorality, theft, false testimony, slander." (Matthew 15:19) So we will continue to not only challenge the mind, but impact the heart, to help this great generation be passionate followers of Christ!

What's the title (of this blog or of your pastor...)?

Tye, one of the great pastors I work with at New Covenant, recently blogged about "titles". His post came immediately to mind when I saw this video parody-ing the NBC "The More You Know" commercials.

I must say, some of the commercials on the "The Church You Know" site are really funny, while others "ride the line" of offensiveness (for some, they are way OVER the line!). I guess some people feel you have to do that in order to engage people to think and discuss critical issues. I've seen it with the XXX Church guys as well several people involved with the emerging church.

Live Life

I just ran across this quote in my files while looking for something else...

I want people who are sick to know that a good life doesn't need to be a long life; that they can live the life God gave them, not the life they wish God gave them.

And who is attributed with saying this quote? Cubby De Prince, an 8 year old with AIDS. I sure hope that is true and not some Internet hoax, because that is one awesome quote.

Tears and Confession...

I want to cry.

As I woke up to the radio this morning, I heard a news report that Ted Haggard, Sr. Pastor of New Life Church in Colorado Springs, CO and now-former president of the National Association of Evangelicals, was being accused of having a three-year homosexual affair. When I got to my office (after speaking at Isaac Newton Christian Academy's chapel), I headed to the Internet (before it was down for 5 hours today!) to learn more.

One of the first things I saw was an interview with Haggard. He denied knowing the guy, denied ever doing drugs, and claimed he was faithful to his wife. As I watched his eyes and body language, I truly believed he was telling the truth.

But now, just moments ago, I learned that he has admitted that "some of the accusations against him are true".

I am not going to make judgements about Ted or the accuser, Mike Jones, at this time. I've already seen too much of that in the few news articles I've seen so far. But if ANY of it is true, it makes me extremely sad. Sad that Ted would do what he knew was wrong. Sad that Ted lied to the media initially. Sad that Mike Jones chose to reveal this hoping to influence some ballots in Colorado.

But also sad because I know this could be me.

No, I've never had a homosexual affair. Heck, I've never even had a homosexual desire. And I've never had a heterosexual affair either.

But I have thought about a sexual tryst. I've looked too long at a woman on the street and wondered certain things. I know I've had all sorts of sinful thoughts and have been tempted in many ways many times. And if I'm not careful, I, too, could end up temporarily removed from my job while an investigation takes place.

This all comes on top of a book I just started yesterday. The book, Confessions of a Pastor, is gut-wrenchingly honest. I sat in my office earlier this morning with my Executive Pastor, Kim Pagel, looking through the chapter titles and realizing "Yep, I've thought that. Yep, I've struggled with that. Yep, that's me!"

As I read the first couple chapters during my reading time yesterday, I realized I HAVE to let certain people in (first and foremost my wife!) simply so I don't end up in a Ted Haggard situation. I love the Lord, my wife, my kids, my church, and my staff family too much to throw it all away for some momentary "fun" or "release". My pride wants so much to keep people out and maintain a certain persona, but God keeps telling me not to - I will eventually be found out if I try to hide the real me from those who matter most in my life. And besides, I'm not fooling Him a bit!

And so I want to cry. I want to cry tears of pain because of my own sin. I want to shed tears of sadness for Ted and Mike and New Life Church. And I want to release tears of joy that God is gently calling me to the painful-yet-freeing process of confession once again.

Therefore confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed.
James 5:16a (NIV)

Real Beauty

A while back, Mark Eades, our Jr. High Pastor at New Covenant, showed this Dove film to me (think soap, not Christian music awards...). He is planning to show it to his Jr. High girls.

Tonight during a wedding rehearsal dinner, this video came up as a topic of conversation. A couple of people hadn't seen it, so I'm posting it here for them and others to see this excellent 1 minute film that makes you think about what REALLY makes someone beautiful.

More Phil Vischer

After posting about Godless Veggies, I saw Phil Vischer's new venture - JellyFish. On this new site is the story of how Phil went from starting and losing VeggieTales to starting JellyFish Labs. When I came across these two paragraphs, they really hit me at this busy time in my life:

---
Through the experience, Phil realized some interesting things. First, our relationships with God are much more important than our work for God. God doesn?t want us to be ?busy,? he wants us to be available. He doesn?t want us to focus on ?impact,? he wants us to focus on obedience. If we?re walking with Him, we?ll know when He has something specific for us to do. We don?t need to make stuff up. If we?re so wrapped up in the work we?re doing for God that we can?t even make eye contact with the person bagging our groceries, something in our lives is way out of whack.

Second, to be a Christian is to give Christ ?lordship? of our lives. That?s what it means. He?s Lord, we?re not. And if we?ve given Christ lordship of our lives, where we are in 20 years is, frankly, none of our business. Where we are in 5 years is none of our business. What is our business, is what God has told us to do today, and whether or not we?re doing it. That?s it.
---

God is so kind to me. Every time I hit a busy spell like this, I seem to get the above reminder in some form or another. Thanks, God, for the reminder. I needed it.

Appearance is Everything?

Trivia question: Name the following company based on its litany of honors...

Received six awards in 2000 for being environmentally friendly
Fortune - America's most innovative company for six consecutive years (1996 to 2001)
Fortune - America's #2 company for Quality of Management, 2001
Fortune - America's 22nd best company to work for in 2000
Fortune - 2nd ranked American company for employee talent in 2000
Financial Times - Energy Company of the Year, 2000
Global Finance - World's best company in the Energy Sector, 2001

And the Answer is... are you ready for this... Enron.*

While everything looked so good externally for this energy giant, the core of the company was rotting due to extremely poor decisions. Today the word "Enron" doen't bring to mind "innovative" or "best", rather the word brings to most people's minds words like "failure", "corruption", "deceit", "fraud", and the like.

Sometimes I fear a lot of Christians live life like Enron. They try to appear like they have everything together, when spiritually and emotionally they are dry and possibly even rotting. They wear the smile on Sunday while their pillow is wet from tears. They carry the words of God under their arm, but God seems so far away. And they hate themselves for their hypocrisy.

So what's the cure? Confession.

It is amazing what a dose of truth can do. It may seem painful to let the blazing light of truth crash into the darkness of our souls - but our spiritual eyes will adjust and we will eventually be thankful that the truth is known.

Are you being a spiritual "Enron"? If so, who can you safely go to and confess the emptiness to?

(source: Leadership Wired)

Integrity as Influence

I just read this article by Gordon MacDonald. I really liked it, because like Gordon, I hope to influence those outside of my "bandwidth" (unlike Gordon, I don't have 67 years of wisdom in me yet...).

But as I reflect on the article, I think the key to influencing anyone in any age group is to be a person of integrity (you act the same no matter what the circumstance), truthfulness, passion, and grace. I truly believe godly character, Christ-focused living, and people-centered actions transcend age.

What are you, as a young adult, doing to reach outside your "bandwidth"? Are you living beyond your own generation? And are you living as a person of integrity, which will encourage your elders to take you seriously and the generations behind you to think highly of you?

A Person Built For Others

Stick with me here...

Built For Self
NBC launched a new series this fall called "Book of Daniel" that raised a few eyebrows among the media and more than ruffled some feathers in Christian circles. I've never seen an episode, but a good friend of mine named Mark (who also happens to be the Sr. High Pastor at our church) did, and was shocked at what he saw. So shocked, in fact, that he not only blogged about it to the parents of his Sr. Highers, but he sent emails to people trying to get them to contact stations and ask them to pull the show. He's not an activist type, so for him to go to such lengths told me just how offensive the show was.

One of the people who decided to look into this matter after getting Mark's email was our Sr. Pastor. Bob had heard from another friend back in Ohio who had seen the show and was quite offended, so when Mark emailed, Bob decided to contact the station. His email was polite, but stated why Bob, as a follower of Jesus who had made his life vocation that of a pastor, was offended by the show's premise, plots, and characters. After typing it out, he sent it Tuesday morning, January 24th, to KWWL, our local NBC affiliate.

Dale Woods, the VP and General Manager of KWWL, sent a reply about an hour later to Bob. Here's what he wrote:

Bob-

Thanks for your email. NBC has cancelled this show, so why are you still complaining?

Thanks for watching Iowa's News Channel.
Dale?

Bob had no idea that show had been cancelled (NBC seems to have made the decision Monday night, January 23rd, but one NBC affiliate said it was Tuesday afternoon, which would have been AFTER Bob got the email from Mr. Woods.

Built For Others
Mr. Woods terse reply stood in strong contrast to the message I received out of the book "Season of Life" which I had just finished the morning I read Mr. Woods curt email. The author, Jeffrey Marx, tells the story of Joe Ehrmann (pictured), a former Baltimore Colt star who at the time of the book was a pastor and an assistant high school football coach. The book tells the story of the Gilman High School 2001 football season, but it is so much more than about football. What Joe Ehrmann, and head coach Biff Poggi, are trying to accomplish is in the name of their "organization" - Building Men For Others.

I was so surprised to find myself choked up at times during the book, praying that I would be a man built for others, and that I would be the type of father that would raise my son and daughters to be Built for Others. It is not a "Christian" book, and yet I found myself being drawn once again to be like Christ, who's focus through his time on earth was on others.

So do you want to be like Mr. Woods of KWWL, who views feedback as complaints and people as a nuisance, or do you want to be a person Built for Others, who views people as our purpose, who seeks justice, who empathizes with the afflicted, and who isn't afraid to say "I Love You" (and isn't afraid to say "I'm sorry" when you haven't been a person of empathy)?

How will you live your life? Built for self? Or built for others?

Living without Clarifiers

Personal News
Since we've told most everyone in person, figured I'd put it on the blog that no one reads, but at least I'd FEEL like I shared the big news with all of cyberspace. LeAnn and I are expecting Baby Bird #4 sometime around September 1! We are super excited, but I tell people we'd be even more excited if LeAnn wasn't so sick. So you can pray for my wife and our family as we battle through conflicting emotions of excitement and discouragement (and pray that LeAnn would feel well!).

Our family website has been updated too (finally after two years!).

Personal Thoughts
LeAnn and I received am unexpected $25 Target gift card as a late Christmas present. Since LeAnn will be gaining weight this year, and I need to lose some, we felt that after 11 and a half years of marriage it was finally time to get a scale.

After opening the box and placing our new Taylor scale on the floor, I thought I'd better skim the manual (you know, it's been so long I wasn't sure I knew how to use one anymore...). I stepped on the scale, and the number was way too high, so I thought I had better check the manual to make sure I did everything right. But the manual said nothing about the scale having a sense of humor and randomly elevating the number on the LCD screen.

As I got ready to throw my incredibly-extensive-and-highly-informative-and-very-possibly-sarcastic manual away, I noticed some words on the back page at the very bottom. It said "Made to our exact specifications in China."

I laughed! I found it funny they put "exact specifications" so that you didn't think the scale was a piece of junk. But that's what "Made in China" means to a lot of people - junk. And so the Taylor Company felt they had to add a clarifier in order for the scale to be accepted.

It's kind of like when G.W. ran for president. He classified himself as a "compassionate conservative". The term "conservative" had taken on a bad reputation in the public's eye, and so George's team added a clarifier to make him more presentable and acceptable to the voting public.

Unfortunately, many in Christendom have felt the need to do the same thing. We need to be "Evangelical Christians" or "Charismatic Christians" or "Liberal" or "Conservative" or some other clarifier so that we will be accepted by the right groups.

Why do we do this? My theory: a need to feel accepted. We tack on clarifiers so that we are more palatable. Maybe we should call these "sugar words". They shouldn't be necessary, but we seem to think they are needed in order for us to be liked by the right people.

But I notice something about Jesus in the Scriptures. We don't see him living life with clarifiers. He wasn't labeled as a Pharisee Jew. Or a Saducee Jew. Or an Essene Jew. He's not even associated with other rabbis (as the disciple of Rabbi Hillel or Rabbi Shimmai). In fact, many of the religious leaders tried to get him to add clarifiers to his identity. "Who gave you this authority to teach or to heal or to forgive sins?" "He gets his power from Beelzebub" "If you really are the Son of God, come off that cross - then we'll believe!"

But Jesus lived his life without clarifiers to make himself more palatable or presentable or acceptable. Does this mean we find a jerk in the Scriptures who lived life devoid of love, caring nothing of people and their opinions? Hardly! But because Christ didn't allow himself to be shaped into the image of a particular group, he was free to love everyone. He was able to be a servant without it being detrimental to his self-esteem. He was able to hang out with "sinners" despite the opinion of the elite. And He was able to die on a cross for the sins of the world.

So let me ask you: are you living with clarifiers? Are you trying to make yourself more presentable to certain groups so that you will be liked, or given a raise, or nominated for that coveted award, or more loved by the God you've shaped in your mind?

Be like Christ: seek to be who God made you to be so that you can love those God sent you to love. May you not live for the acceptance of others, but rather may you live for the acceptance of the Father through Jesus Christ, who gave his life for yours upon a cruel cross.

What makes you attractive?

CNN has a report on their website about the skin-care industry targeting young adults to use their products before they "need" to use them (like when they are an "ancient" 45 years old...).

If someone wants to use anti-aging creme when they are only 22, that's fine with me. But I wonder - is that person putting in the same amount of time and energy and effort to also be inwardly attractive?

What about you? Is your focus on your outward appearance (skin, clothes, hair, car, job, schedule, friends, etc.)? Or are you giving priority to the inner world (spirit, mind, humility, love, peace, joy, hope, faith, courage, wisdom, etc.)? Because God is REALLY attracted to who you are more than he is to what you look like.

"The LORD does not look at the things man looks at. Man looks at the outward appearance, but the LORD looks at the heart." 1 Samuel 16:7b (NIV)

Weddings

I'm officiating a wedding tomorrow night. Colbee and Vivi make a great couple. They have a beautiful location out at the gazebo at Touch of Class. They've picked out one of my favorite passages,Colossians 3:12-17, to be read in Portuguese and English (Vivi is from Brazil). While I probably should blog about this after the fact, I know it is going to be a beautiful ceremony. I love weddings.

Why?
I think I love officiating weddings because I get to be up front with a couple during a holy, mystical moment. To stand there and watch two great individuals vow before God and friends to enter into a marriage covenant and allow God to make them one flesh is so incredible, I find it difficult to provide the right words.

But I also love what weddings do to me. As I verbally paint a picture of what a God-designed marriage looks like, I am reminded each time of what my own marriage should look like. And often I find myself needing to make small changes to be the husband that God wants me to be and the husband a great woman like LeAnn deserves (and so that I'm not a huge hypocrit to all of these couples I do pre-marital counseling with!).

If you are married, are you being the husband or wife that God wants you to be? If you are single, what are you doing now to develop your character to be the husband or wife God desires you to become in case he holds marriage in your future?

In Christ...

Man, I have so many blog ideas in my head, but just not time to get them typed out here. I really should be heading home right now, but I've got a moment to type here, so I'm taking it.

Are you living "in Christ"?
I started Ephesians this past week in my personal reading time. Man, is it rich! Already done with it, but I'm going to re-read through it a few times I think. As I started chapter 1 on Tuesday, I couldn't help but be overwhelmed with how many times Paul says "in Christ" or "through Christ" or "in him" or some other variant. I was in the NET Bible this week (may do a different translation this next time through) and "in Christ" was jumping out all over the place!

It really got me. Do I see my all of my life as being "in Christ", or just a little part of me? Do I see the circumstances around me as being "in Christ" or do I just let them pass me by? Am I doing the things I do during my day "through Christ" or in my own strength?

How about you? Are you daily living "in Christ"?

Are you a flashbang?

Just heard about a book entitled Flashbang. A flashbang, as the author (Mark Steele) puts it in a side column in the July/August edition of Relevant Magazine, is "a weapon used by our nation's military that is, in fact, not a weapon. It is a grenade that makes the sound of an explosion and creates a blast of light, but does not actually cause any destruction: the flashbang. It looks and sounds like a grenade, but leaves nothing behind."

He goes on to say, "Unfortunately, I used to live a flashbang life. Making a lot of noise and putting on quite a show without leaving any real permanent mark. [My book] is the story of how God changed me so that my faith leaves a stain."

What Kind of Bomb Are You?
I immediately had to make Mark's thought personal (and since you are reading this, I'll include you as well). Are we living "flashbang" lives? We say the right words and do the right things to complete the image we want people to see (mine being a good little Christian boy), but do we have the type of faith and character that when people come into contact with us, we will "leave a stain?"

I don't know about you, but I don't want to be a flashbang Christian. I want this faith that I have been given by God to be authentic, to be real, to be deep, to be genuine. I want to be a person of true character.

But how do we get there? How do we become the kind of follower of Jesus I am talking about? I have some ideas on what the journey should look like, but I don't want to spoil all your exploration fun by giving you a preprinted map warped with my opinions. I'm sure I'll leave a scattered cookie crumb trail throughout my blog, but for now, let me leave it here - "what should the path ahead towards deep faith and Christlike character look like so that we aren't just flashbangs?"

(P.S. The book Uprising I mentioned in my last post is a great place to search for answers to that question. ;o)