Becoming a Caring Community

Since my last post was about basketball, I thought I'd post something else that involves the round ball. A friend showed me the video on ESPN's website about Jason McElwain, the autistic boy who scored 20 points in the last 4 minutes of the only basketball game he played in his entire high school career.

What so moves me about the video is not that he scored such a high amount of points in his only game in 4 years, but it is the reaction of the student body and basketball team. Jason has autism, which means he is different than the average high school student - and yet that doesn't matter to these kids. Jason is part of their team, part of their high school, and so they are thrilled when he gets a moment to shine. There is no jealousy that he was the game's high scorer, there was only celebration.

Do you celebrate with others when great things happen to them? Are you empathetic with the situations other people are facing? Do you "rejoice with those who rejoice" (Romans 12:15)? Or are you jealous when great things happen to your friends? Are you a caring community member or a self-absorbed member?

"Guest Vision" in Basketball Liturgy

I thought this was an excellent article about making guests feel comfortable in a new environment (whether its your favorite college coliseum or your church).

What are you, as a Christian young adult, doing to ease the transition for church visitors to become friends? Are you walking around church with "guest vision" or are you "member blind" because you are so well acquainted with your church environment?

The McPassion

It was January of 2004. I was sitting in the "old" auditorium at Willow Creek Community Church in Barrington, IL blessed with the opportunity to go to a pastor's advance screening of The Passion of the Christ. I was excited to see the highly touted Mel Gibson film, but was leery of all the "hype" around it - especially when I saw the words "The Greatest Evangelistic Opportunity in 2000 years" attached to flyers and an intro to the film produced by Outreach Marketing.

A couple weeks later I tag-teamed with another pastor at our church who also saw the preview showing with me to do a message about the Passion of the Christ. I told people the movie was well-done, but very intense, yet could be a great opportunity to share about Jesus' sacrifice on the cross for the forgiveness of our sins. Not once did I say that Mel's flick was "the greatest evangelistic opportunity in 2000 years..." and that people MUST see it.

Then Narnia came. I was super excited about the film because I just finished reading the entire Narnia series to my oldest daughter. But when the church was approached about promoting the film, I was leery once again. I don't feel like the church should be Hollywood's promotion machine to get into Christian's wallets.

Apparently I'm not the only who feels this way. One filmmaker is so disgusted with churches telling their congregations which movies it is their "duty" to see, that he responded to this issue... in film.

I showed this 4 minute satire to one guy and we laughed hysterically together. However, it appears not everyone is laughing.

What are your thoughts?

The Best Birthday Gifts...

Yesterday was my birthday. I like my birthdays when they go by like an ordinary day. I've never enjoyed having a big deal made about me. And so yesterday was a great day because I was just so busy going about things like an ordinary day.

Until I got home.

I've decided that my birthday isn't for me anymore. It's for my kids. While I don't want a big deal made about me - my kids like having a big deal made about them, and since that is "birthday culture" in their minds, they want to extend the "favor" to me. But I learned yesterday what the best presents are.

The best birthday gifts I got yesterday were:

- a spontaneous hug from my two year old
- a homemade card from my 8 year old
- a gorgeous smile from my 5 year old when I walked in the door
- and watching Cinderella Man with my wife

So what "presents" are you getting that you may not realize are there? Are you letting the precious things of life slip by unnoticed because you are wanting a "big deal" made about you?

Becoming a Lover of Strangers...

Well, it's happened again.

One of the young adults I work with is leaving the church family I'm a part of. Not because of anything I've done (thankfully!) or because she believes this to be a bad or heretical church. Her reason is pretty simple: she didn't connect.

She tried. Oh did she try. She called people. She hung around for well over a year. She tried opening up. But rarely did anyone call her. Rarely was she given a warm welcome by the regulars. Rarely was she invited from the end of the table to join the conversation in the middle.

It hurts. I hurt - I considered her family. I consider all of the young adults I work with to be family. And every time one of them moves on - whether due to job change or marriage or whatever - I hurt. I do celebrate with them if it's appropriate (just as I celebrate with this particular young adult that she has found a different church that instantly felt like home) but inwardly I hurt.

But why did this other church feel like home? She was welcomed. She found a church family that practiced hospitality.

I've been told by a very reliable source that the word "hospitality" in the Greek means "lover of strangers." It's so easy to love those we already know, to go shake hands with the person we just hung out with last night, to call up those we "click" with - but what about the new person, the outsider, the stranger?

The church I am a part of is a very hospitable place - we just missed it with this one gal. The group she was a part of didn't go the distance required to make her part of the family - they left her feeling like the unwanted step child. But rather than just mourn this loss, I want to use it to remind me to be a lover of all people, even strangers.

So I am committing myself to calling new people more. I'm making a decision today to shoot off more quick "hello" emails. I'm going to get back to what I used to regularly do - walk up to complete strangers and make them feel at home.

So I challenge you, as a young adult, to be a lover of strangers. To make new people acquaintances and acquaintances friends. To welcome someone new this week with a smile and your name. To extended the hand of friendship to that new coworker. To take a plate of cookies to your new neighbor. To invite that guest at your church into your "church home" and give them a tour. To help new people connect because once upon a time you were a "new person".

Temptation

Just read this in an email I got from a friend:

---

In October of 2005, The Associated Press ran an article "Study Backs Out of Sight Out of Mind Theory"

The study, led by Brian Wansink, involved placing candy jars of Hershey?s Kisses in close proximity to a select group of secretaries.

Some of the containers were clear while other containers were opaque. Additionally, some of the containers were placed on the secretaries? desks while other containers were placed six feet from their desk.

READY FOR THE RESULTS?

"Secretaries ate an average of 7.7 kisses each day when the candies were in clear containers on their desk; 4.6 when in opaque jar on the desk; 5.6 when in clear jars 6 feet away and 3.1 when in opaque jar 6 feet away."

The study went further. "Secretaries rated candy as more than twice as hard to resist when they could see and reach it than when they could not. They were twice as likely to say that they often thought of the chocolates or that the treats kept grabbing their attention if they visible and nearby. By contrast secretaries were twice as likely to say they forget the candy was around if it was hidden and distant."

---

As I read that, I wondered how many young adults willingly place themselves in situations that are going to tempt them? If someone is struggling with an alcohol addiction, should she walk into a bar? If someone can't say no to sleeping with his girlfriend, should he be staying at her place late at night?

If you are human, chances are you have a weakness, and when temptation strikes, you can't say no. So what "opaque jars" are you putting in your life so that you can be freer from the temptation? And why are you keeping the "jars" on your "desk" at all?

No temptation has seized you except what is common to man. And God is faithful; he will not let you be tempted beyond what you can bear. But when you are tempted, he will also provide a way out so that you can stand up under it. (1 Corinthians 10:13)

A Church Quotes Satan...

I know ALL Scripture is God-breathed, but I still don't think I would put a Bible verse that is a quote of Satan on the home page of my church website!

The Art of Evangelism?

The American church is often accused of stealing from the the business world for their own gain. Looks like the business world is stealing from the church these days...

Guy Kawasaki's "The Art of Evangelism"

Integrity as Influence

I just read this article by Gordon MacDonald. I really liked it, because like Gordon, I hope to influence those outside of my "bandwidth" (unlike Gordon, I don't have 67 years of wisdom in me yet...).

But as I reflect on the article, I think the key to influencing anyone in any age group is to be a person of integrity (you act the same no matter what the circumstance), truthfulness, passion, and grace. I truly believe godly character, Christ-focused living, and people-centered actions transcend age.

What are you, as a young adult, doing to reach outside your "bandwidth"? Are you living beyond your own generation? And are you living as a person of integrity, which will encourage your elders to take you seriously and the generations behind you to think highly of you?

Keeping My Zipper Up

My son is moving into a new phase of life. He is embracing his "twoness" full force. Don't get me wrong - he's a GREAT kid, and I am so humbled to be his dad. He brings lots of smiles and laughs to our family.

But he is still all boy. And he is still very "2". And in his exploration of life, he pushes the envelope, even crossing the line of disobedience.

One of the simple acts of rebellion he has been engaging in is the removal of his pajamas while in bed. (I know that's a horribly grievous sin, but we're working on it with him.) To help him "obey" (and stay warm), we have started using a safety pin to keep the zipper in the upright closed position where little fingers can't move the zipper to the toes.

This morning I went in to S's room to get a very happy 2-year-old out of bed (and to keep him quiet so that his pregnant mommy could keep sleeping). As I entered the room, S triumphantly called out "Pajamas On!" (well, actually it was more like "djam djam ah!") He was announcing his obedience at keeping his zipper up and not being found naked. But of course he was still in his "djam djams"! I had safety pinned the zipper up last night to ensure his compliance!

Like Father Like Son
I think sometimes I can be a "two-year-old" when it comes to my relationship with my Heavenly Daddy. I do something like write a song, or preach a sermon, or give wise counsel to someone, and I start proudly thinking "Look how great I am, Father!"

But I've got it all wrong. Sure, I've done those things, and they are good things to do, but rather than get a big head about it, I should be humbled. It is God out of his grace who gave me the gifts and desires to write songs, or teach people, or serve my wife, or whatever it is I do in life that brings God glory. Rather than triumphantly shout when God enters my room "Look Daddy at what great things I've done!" I should be humbly saying, "thank you, Father, for giving me these talents and gifts to use for your glory."

So in your relationship to your Heavenly Daddy through Jesus Christ, are you trying to proudly let God (and others) know the great things you've done? Or are you humbly thanking Him for allowing you, out of his grace, to do these great things for His Kingdom and His reknown?