Just need to vent...

RRRRRRR!

I need to vent for a second. I just heard from a female friend who confided that she was recently sexually assaulted by an acquaintance. My heart broke as I read her words and I am really angry with the anonymous person who did such a thing. NO one deserves to be treated that way as a creation of God. But because I know my friend, it seems even worse.

She is such a quality person. How could a guy even THINK of doing this to her, let alone act upon those thoughts?

Thankfully my friend has a good support system. And because she is such a quality person, I know she will heal and emerge stronger through this - possibly even go on to bless other women who go through a similar tragedy. But I still wish it hadn't happened to her.

If you are a guy and are reading this - don't you EVER touch a girl in a sexual way who is not your wife! I don't care how sexually frustrated you are or how attractive she is. If you cheat God's beautiful design for sex and relationships, then you will be even more sexually frustrated, she won't be as attractive after the incident, and you might end up with a criminal record. And if you are feeding your mind with materials that tell you that "all women want it", then take the trash out. Women want a man who will lead them by sacrificing for them (check out Eph 5:22-33!). Taking advantage of their body for your own pleasure is not sacrifice.

And women, if you've been sexually assaulted and have never told anyone, please do! Your healing will only happen as you open up to the right people (preferably another woman) who can help you work through what you experienced. God wants you to sexually enjoy your husband and give yourself to him, so don't let one jerk's selfishness rob you of the joy of being united physically and emotionally with a loving, sacrificing husband.

Man... this had been such a good day up until this point. I get to officiate a wedding this weekend - and unfortunately I think I know what will be on my mind as I pronounce Zac & Erin husband and wife. Hopefully one day my female friend will get that opportunity and this incident won't ruin that day for her...

On a positive note, my sister-in-law gave birth to Rylan Asher Bird today. Welcome to the family, Rylan! And congrats Derek & Becka! Hopefully Rylan's cousin will be here soon (but preferably AFTER Zac and Erin's wedding!).

Pieces of Glass

I found a surprise in my office today. A strange manila envelope was on my desk, clearly with something thicker than just a letter inside.

As I opened it up I was thrilled to find a copy of the soon-to-be released book "Pieces of Glass"! The story contained in its pages is that of my friend, Sarah Kay Ndjerareou. It is a heartbreaking story of the emotional pain Sarah went through as a result of a debilitating skiing accident her fiance suffered.

My wife and I were actually in Cedar Rapids candidating for the position I now hold when the news was shared with the church that Sarah's fiance was critically injured. I remember praying for this injured young man and his fiance whom I did not know.

Over time, I got to meet Sarah and I discovered she was a remarkable young woman. And then to my pleasant surprise, she married my good friend Nate a couple years later. And now she is a published author. Even though Sarah's life-story is still being written, I praise God that the splintered pieces of glass she saw from her life have been used to create a beautiful mosaic. I pray that the family of Sarah's former fiance are seeing some of the same work from God in their lives as well.

To get your own copy of "Pieces of Glass", pre-order it from Amazon or Zondervan. Or support your local Christian bookstore by getting the book after August 1st there.

Sarah has a blog with TONS of pictures of her daughter Sophia (and a couple with Nate as well!). Stop by and tell her "congrats" on the publication of her new book!

And to hear Sarah's story (as told to the Watershed crowd on May 26, 2005) click here. (This is the only place you'll find this link!)

Appearance is Everything?

Trivia question: Name the following company based on its litany of honors...

Received six awards in 2000 for being environmentally friendly
Fortune - America's most innovative company for six consecutive years (1996 to 2001)
Fortune - America's #2 company for Quality of Management, 2001
Fortune - America's 22nd best company to work for in 2000
Fortune - 2nd ranked American company for employee talent in 2000
Financial Times - Energy Company of the Year, 2000
Global Finance - World's best company in the Energy Sector, 2001

And the Answer is... are you ready for this... Enron.*

While everything looked so good externally for this energy giant, the core of the company was rotting due to extremely poor decisions. Today the word "Enron" doen't bring to mind "innovative" or "best", rather the word brings to most people's minds words like "failure", "corruption", "deceit", "fraud", and the like.

Sometimes I fear a lot of Christians live life like Enron. They try to appear like they have everything together, when spiritually and emotionally they are dry and possibly even rotting. They wear the smile on Sunday while their pillow is wet from tears. They carry the words of God under their arm, but God seems so far away. And they hate themselves for their hypocrisy.

So what's the cure? Confession.

It is amazing what a dose of truth can do. It may seem painful to let the blazing light of truth crash into the darkness of our souls - but our spiritual eyes will adjust and we will eventually be thankful that the truth is known.

Are you being a spiritual "Enron"? If so, who can you safely go to and confess the emptiness to?

(source: Leadership Wired)

Assuming the Heart

Ames, Iowa, home to Iowa State University, has made a bit of news this week. Thousands of people are descending upon the city for a big event, and so to "help out" the university student newspaper thought that they would give tips and info about the community. And the headline they chose played off of the popular "Dummies" books. But the reason this is making the news and blog sites is because the event is the Special Olympic National Games.

The students from the paper claim it was an innocent mistake, and even the event organizer has recognized it as such. But some people won't give it up, making assumptions about the motives of the students, harshly criticizing them over this mistake, calling them "insensitive" and implying the newspaper editors are the "dummies".

In other news, a 4 year old boy was stripped of his pageant crown as "Little Mr. Apricot" in California for flipping off the crowd with his middle finger. Organizers were outraged and gave the title to the runner up. Mom says he was trying to say he was #1, but he often confuses his index and middle fingers. Just recently my 6 year old daughter innocently kept pointing with her middle finger, and we kept correcting her - so I buy the mom's version. But again, as public opinion weighs in, negative assumptions are being made about the heart of the mom, the kid, and the pageant authorities.

These two stories clashed in my mind today with my own heart. As I felt sad about the quick judgment people were rushing too, I realized that yesterday I had done the exact same thing.

Due to an email I received, I investigated online a clash between prominent Christian figures. Assumptions about the motivations of one pastor caused a second pastor and his network to make sweeping judgments against the first pastor as well as take a hard stand against another movement within the Church. But this first story led me to another sort of unrelated story about a church where the transition from one pastor to another hadn't gone too well. I made all sorts of judgments against the outgoing pastor, assuming negative things about his heart and motivations.

Perhaps I was right - maybe the outgoing pastor really is as conniving as the online evidence seemed to support. But I am not involved in the case one bit and my opinion won't change a thing - so why was I so quick to assume the worst about a man's character?

As I read blogs and stories yesterday about the first incident concerning one pastor's strong stance against another pastor, I read tons of comments that other readers left. They rushed to judgment, typing sweeping statements of condemnation against the first pastor, assuming the worst about his heart, intentions, and motivations. I found myself extremely dissappointed in the Body of Christ yesterday. But then when I realized I did the exact same thing about the failed-transtion story, I was dissappointed in myself.

My silent prayers both last night and this morning were that God would give me a pure heart and that through the Holy Spirit I would operate with a clear conscience. In the past year I have felt like my heart and motives have been judged and negatively assumed by some. I want to live my life in such a way that these people would lack evidence to support their opinion. And I want to live my life in such a way that I don't judge others so quickly and that I am a man of grace.

Mankind makes mistakes because he is sinful. But last time I checked, I was part of mankind. That God for the cross of Christ!